


Finding the Right Words to Say

by whythefujamievenonthis



Category: Holby City
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-05
Updated: 2018-04-05
Packaged: 2019-04-18 20:20:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,728
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14221008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whythefujamievenonthis/pseuds/whythefujamievenonthis
Summary: Thank you to bell88x9y for the prompt





	Finding the Right Words to Say

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to bell88x9y for the prompt

Lofty had being trying to say it for weeks, maybe months, concocting every plan hatchable to tell Dom how he felt; how he wanted to spend the rest of his life with him, how much he loved him. He loved Dom, so much so that he was desperate to say it, and even though Dom had already told him he wanted to say it in his own way, he wanted it to be perfect.

 

But nothing seemed to go perfect for Lofty.

 

The first plan he had was to say it on a coffee cup; the day he’d attempted to carry out the gesture, he and Dom were sat at a table for two at Pulses, he’d said he’d buy Dom a coffee. Before the drink was placed into the to-go cup Lofty had requested the barista write “I love you a latte” on the side of the cup, which she happily complied to do. Once the drink was made and paid for, Lofty made his way back over to Dom to hand him the drink, but on his way over he got cold feet, and immediately returned to the barista and asked for a protective sleeve for the cup (which would also hide the writing). Finally he returned to the table he was sharing with Dom and they continued their lunch date - Dom never saw the writing on the cup, and the attempt was eventually thrown in the bin. Lofty was back to square one and in need of a new plan.

 

Attempt No.2 was a tad more subtle, if not cheesy. With this plan Lofty had to set his mind back to the day Ollie was on Keller after his first surgery; the day him and Dom were talking about New Year’s resolutions. This idea took place on a Wednesday afternoon on AAU, they two of them were working together, and as they were returning from the lab Lofty initiated a conversation:

 

“You know, I’ve been looking into that Esperanto stuff.”

 

“Oh really?” replied Dom, having remembered bringing it up all those months back, “What about the saxophone?”

 

“That’s still happening, don’t get me wrong, but I thought I’d pick up a few phrases.”

 

“Yeah? What have you learnt so far.”

 

“I’ll warn you, Esperanto is a language of romance, you might keel over into my arms if you hear it.”

 

“I’m sure I’ll live.” replied Dom, smiling, “Go on, do your worst!”

 

Just as Lofty was about to say those three little words, Dom’s pager went off, its buzzing putting the conversation to a grinding halt in the process: Dom was needed in surgery.

 

“Crap, you’re gonna have to put the language of love on hold, I’m needed for a blood supply reconstruction in the right arm.” with that Dom gave Lofty a peck on the cheek before sprinting down the hallway they’d been travelling down and rushing into theatre.

 

Stunned by the unplanned ending of the conversation, all Lofty would do was stand there and mutter aloud to himself, “Mi amas vin…” followed by a slightly louder, “For goodness sake.”

 

Of course he tried over and over again after that, but by the failure of his fifth plan, Lofty was beginning to struggle for ideas: a serenade was way out of his comfort zone, a cheesy poster and boom box was too cliche, and he didn’t want to recycle his already used ideas. He quite fancied the idea of having Dom do a jigsaw that spelled out “You’re my missing piece”, but Lofty didn’t have the funds, and neither him or Dom had the time to do a jigsaw. Nothing seemed to work, and as the weeks carried on, as each plan fell flat on its face, Lofty grew more and more anxious and stressed - two emotions which began to overflow onto his workload.

 

It’d been several weeks since Lofty had decided he wanted to tell Dom he loved him, he'd hoped he would have a regular night on AAU, but as his shift with Dominic progressed he soon realised the word “love” began to stick out like a sore thumb to him. Almost every patient he and Dom treated either had a significant other or a family member there with them to remind them how much they were loved. Every wife and husband and partner, every elderly person, every child sat there with their guardian, they all seemed to say the word “love” at some point or another, and it began to play on Lofty’s paranoia and stress. And whenever Lofty got stressed, he got very, very clumsy.

 

As the shift progressed Lofty dropped fluid bags, knocked over trays, tripped on rogue cleaning mops and everything that was in the sight of his feet. Dom knew by now that Lofty was only really clumsy (as he was that day) when something was playing on his mind, so attempted to confront the curly haired nurse about it:

 

“Hey, Lofty, is everything alright? You seem a little scatterbrained today.”

 

“Hm, oh, yeah of course, why wouldn't it be?” asked Lofty as he proceeded to walk into the corner of a wall.

 

“Because of that.” smiled Dom, indicating to Lofty’s meeting with the drywall, “You’ve been a tad clumsy today.”

 

“I’m a tad clumsy everyday.”

 

“I know, but today is worse than usual. I, I just don’t want you hurting yourself.”

 

“Honestly,” replied Lofty as he rubbed away the pain in his side from walking into the wall, “I’ll be okay.” he attempted to prove this to Dom further by planting a kiss on his cheek, “Come on, let’s get this shift finished.”

 

With Lofty’s kiss, Dom nodded his head in agreement and the two went over to see they’re newest patient; which was a father and his son - the father was sat in the visitor’s chair that was besides his son’s bed.

 

“Hello there, my name is Doctor Copeland this is my sidekick Nurse Chiltern, we’ll be overseeing your son’s treatment today.” said Dom to the father as he picked up the boy’s medical file that sat at the end of the bed.

 

“Great, thanks Doc, any idea what’s up with him? He cut his leg on a piece of wood when we went camping a couple days ago, but it’s not scabbing up or anything.”

 

“Well, Nurse Chiltern will get some antibiotics and we’ll put a clean dressing on the wound, and we’ll have to take some blood tests to make sure nothing serious is happening.”

 

“Thanks… I’m not, acting paranoid am I? I’ve not dragged him here for nothing?” replied the father as he took a hold of his sons hand.

 

“You’re being a dad to your son, you’re just looking after him, I don’t know all the details quite yet, but you can be quite certain that bringing him here was the right thing.”

 

As the treatment continued Dom soon discovered the boy’s immune system was below average, as well as his ability to heal physical wounds and cuts. With this Dom soon went about setting up a course of treatment which involved stitching the boy’s leg closed and having Lofty giving it a clean and sterilized dressing, and finally, putting the child one a long course of immunity boosters to help with his recovery and overall quality of life. As Dom handed the Dad the prescription sheet, the boy spoke as Lofty stood next to Dom.

 

“Are you two together?” the boy, who couldn’t have been much older than eight or nine, asked.

 

Dom was calm and casual with his reply, “Yeah, we are.”

 

“Are you boyfriends?”

 

“We’ve been dating for a little over four months, yeah, we’re boyfriends.”

 

“Do you love each other then?” asked the boy.

 

“Hey!” muttered the boy’s Dad, giving him a gentle tap on the arm, obviously he thought his son was beginning to pry.

 

“No, no it’s alright.” said Dom, putting the dad at ease, he then turned to face the boy again, “Well, I certainly love him.” confirmed Dom as he nudged himself into Lofty a little.

 

“And do you love him back?” said the boy, turning to look directly at Lofty. This question had startled the nurse more than he’d expected, at that moment he felt all eyes on him; the boy’s the dad’s, especially Dom’s. As much as he wanted to say yes, he couldn’t, it wasn’t how he wanted to say it, he didn’t want to just say "Yeah" - he wanted meaning, he wanted the perfect moment, he wanted to say those three words to Dom and Dom alone. But as he released the question wasn’t going to be dropped he began to panic more, his chest rising and falling a little faster than its usual pace, his eyes widening as he searched for the right words to say, he could almost feel Dom’s eyes gently burrow into the side of his skull; and then all at once it became too much.

 

“I need to go get some air.” he eventually said, excusing himself from the conversation and rushing out of the ward as fast as he could without drawing attention to himself. He didn’t look back to see if Dom or anyone else was following him, all he did was look forward and make his way to anywhere that was quiet and he soon realised that the rooftop would be the perfect place to get away. So that’s where he went. He made his way to the staircase that would lead to the rooftop and began climbing all the countless stars that would take him, he ignored the buzzing coming from his phone (which he would presume to only be Dom) and eventually stood out into the cold night air; he shivered a little before taking a deep breath in and out, and proceeded to walk over and sit himself down next to the edge of the roof so he could look out and see the view. With it being pitch black Lofty couldn’t make out much, pollution had covered the night stars in a veil of smog, all that was there to admire was the dots and dashes of lights that came from the cludesacs and estates that sat in the distance and little ways away from the hospital. The interchanging shades of yellows and pearly white fluorescent lights, the smoke that ebbed from people’s chimney’s, everything seemed amplified and more noticeable in the night time, and in its own way was very beautiful.

 

He stood there for a while, thinking, trying to figure things out; rather than figuring out his feelings, it was the words he needed to convey them that had him stumped. Alice had always said he never had a way with words, Lenny had always jeered that his words stumbled more than his clumsy feet did; and now Lofty was really realising just how true those two were. His shift had finished by the time Dom arrived on the rooftop, he’d been looking for him everywhere: the hospital entrance, Pulses, Keller ward, the roof was the last place he’d expected Lofty to be. He saw his boyfriend sat there on the concrete looking out into the distance, and couldn’t decide if that made him anxious or relieved, slowly he made his way over to the curly haired Nurse and stood next to him, his hands dug deep into his hoodie pockets.

 

“You had me worried there.” Dom said as he looked out into the distance with Lofty.

 

“Sorry.” the Nurse replied, still looking into the distance, “For everything today. Being clumsy, being unable to say those words, for being me, I’m sorry.”

 

“No problem, I know I’ve had worse days than that myself. Could I ask why you’ve been acting off recently? Especially today?”

 

With that Lofty stood up from where he was sat so he would look at Dom when he spoke, “I’ve been, stressed, is all.”

 

“About?” asked Dom, obviously wanted Lofty to go on.

 

With that Lofty caved in, he couldn’t hide it any longer, he didn’t _want_ to hide it any longer, there was no point in doing so - all he had left to do was tell the truth.

 

“The thing is, right, the thing is…” tried Lofty, “God, I dunno how to start this. Okay, I’ve been trying to tell you something for the past few weeks, every time I’ve gone in to say it, something’s stopped me.”

 

“What have you been trying to say?”

 

“There’s these three little words, that I’ve been trying to give to you.”

 

Dom felt his heart flutter at this, but he didn’t let himself get his hopes up, “Really?”

 

“And I’ve been planning all these different ways to tell you, but each one's failed somehow, and today everyone kept saying those words and then that little kid… I just panicked, and I ran away. But I don’t want to run away from it, I never wanted that, I wanted to tell you those words, but in private where only you could hear them.”

 

Dom looked around the rooftop, “Well, nobody’s here, this is a good a place as any, can you say those words now?”

 

Lofty looked around too (as if double checking Dom was right), and silently agreed that it was a good place to say the three words he’d been meaning to say for weeks. Despite the darkness Lofty could clearly see Dom’s eyes, and his smile, and the stubble that was beginning to resurface on his face. He saw Dom and he realised he didn’t need to panic as much as he had, because Dom (as much as he loved organising them) didn’t need big and over the top gestures of romance from him, he didn’t need artistic and well planned words and speeches, Lofty looked at Dom and realised the words he’d been searching for were with Dom the whole time.

 

“I love you, completely, probably hopelessly. I look at you Dom and I see everything, in all the months we’ve been together, even if it hasn’t been that long, you’ve made me fall completely head over heels for you, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

 

Dom couldn’t help but smile, for a while he didn’t say anything, he just looked right at Lofty and grinned with a smile like that of the cheshire cat, eventually he let out, “Well, thank God for that.”

 

“For what?” asked Lofty as he allowed Dom to wrap his arms around his waist.

 

“I thought you’d never say it, I was almost worried.”

“Almost?”

“I soon realised my powers of seduction would get you eventually, so I didn’t panic too much.”

 

“I just wanted to say it at the right time, when you were ready and-.”

 

“I said it after three dates!”

 

“And when I was ready too.”

 

“Ah, fair enough then, I guess.” smirked Dom, “You know, you really did pick a good spot to tell me.” he said as he used his head to gesture to the rooftop, “Even though, technically, I chose it.”

 

“Oh really?” Asked Lofty as he brought his head just that little bit closer to Dom’s.

 

“Yeah, it’s perfect if you ask me.” replied Dom as he copied Lofty and brought his own head in closer, “Oh, and just so you know, I love you too.”

 

“I thought as much.” smirked Lofty before finally leaning his head head close enough for Dom to kiss him. When they met in the middle the kiss they shared was sweet, not short but not overly passionate either, it was the type of kiss that stays on your mind - a memory that shouldn’t be forgotten.

 

With that the two made their way back into the hospital, where they both got changed in the staff changing room, once they were both dressed they made their way out of the building and into a cab; both shattered by the days work and emotions, all they wanted was the rest of the night in with take out and a good film. As they settled into the back seat of the cab Dom allowed his body to relax and he gently rested his head one Loftys shoulder, relief washed through him like a nice breeze; Lofty had finally said he loved him. And with their feelings confirmed for one another, all they had left to do was look forward to their time together.


End file.
